"So when are we going to meet you in person?" Sophie giggled as she looked coyly at the scruffy writer-type looking back at her through the iPhone screen. "It's been three months, and we definitely should all meet for drinks!"
Benji shrugged sheepishly, and with what she thought was a slight twinkle in his eye, said, "Definitely. Soon. I promise. Talk to you ladies later."
The call ended.
"See," Sophie said, handing the phone back to Carly, "everything's fine. He's going to ask you for plans."
Carly wasn't so sure, though, even about the twinkle in Benji's eye, which on second thought, may have been her imagination. Or the sun in his eye as he looked away from the camera to avoid looking at her.
Carly's second thought turned out to be the correct one. Two days later, Benji had "the talk" with Carly: he wasn't looking for anything serious and couldn't be the boyfriend she wanted.
Carly was shocked. It had already been three months. They seemed to be getting along so well — romantic dinners cooked in her apartment and lots of handholding during their frequent walks.
"But what about taking you to dinner?" Carly's mother had asked from time to time as the summer progressed as restaurants began to open for outdoor dining. "People are venturing out a little more, so why don't the two of you ever leave your apartment?"
A simple question and, if COVID-19 hadn't been masking it, one with a simple answer: Benji just wasn't that into Carly.
During the height of quarantine, Benji had found himself a "situationship," where he could Netflix and chill in the comfort of Carly's apartment, not take her out on dates, and not advance the relationship forward into a more serious one. All without having to answer for his actions or, as it appears, inactions.
What Carly had taken for chemistry was actually COVID-19 masking the same dating problems that existed pre-pandemic. It's why Carly dated a guy who wasn't serious about her for as long as she did. Looking back, Carly had missed the signs, the ones which would have made her cut ties with Benji after only a few dates: he didn't want to be seen publicly with Carly or spend money on their dates, and rarely invited her over.
More than six months into the pandemic, Carly's story is far from unique. COVID has created a cuffing season without end. Unless, of course, you're astute enough to end it yourself.
For those unfamiliar with the phenomenon, cuffing season, particularly in areas where there's a change of season, begins around October when the weather turns cold and the days get shorter. It ends around March or April as temperatures start to rise. In the interim, couples who ordinarily wouldn't stay together cuff themselves, keeping themselves warm until they can jump back in the dating pool without freezing their butts off going restaurant and bar hopping. During the winter months, all they want to do is stay warm at home under the covers, so they find someone — anyone — to keep them company there.
When COVID-19 appeared, even the spring weather couldn't get some of these people to uncuff, especially since dating in person these days comes with health risks and uncomfortable questions would-be daters must ask and answer to keep themselves safe. The result is many people have unwittingly found themselves in situationships that mask themselves as real relationships just like Carly did. Carly wasted valuable time with someone who didn't share the same interests and long-term goals or had her best interests at heart.
But shouldn't a warm body be enough for now?
I won't deny it: love involves making sacrifices sometimes. That is except when it comes to not getting the love you want and deserve, and COVID-19 is as bad an excuse as any for staying with someone who doesn't meet your expectations. So please do yourself a huge favor and take it out of the equation. Go back to who you were before the pandemic hit. Then ask yourself who you've become because of it, which should now be someone stronger — and wiser.