The 45+ Woman’s Ultimate Dating Profile Guide: How to Turbocharge Your Launch or Re-Launch

For those launching their online dating adventure or re-launching their profile, this Innovative Match (IM) guide is for YOU! 45+ online daters often proclaim:

“This isn’t working.  I’m not getting the right activity.”

“The men I contact aren’t responding!” 

or “I’m not getting emails from the right demographic.”

Think of posting your dating profile as you would listing your home. Optimize your property and its positioning to attract the maximum number of qualified parties. One of the single fastest ways to increase your dating activity is a profile re-launch following these steps:


1. TAKE STOCK Would you want to date yourself?  Is your profile (including photos) optimized for results? Are you on the right sites? Are your expectations realistic? Are you reaching out to new men regularly? If the answers are “Yes!” and you’ve been on a site for more than 6 months with dwindling activity, it’s time for a change. Opt for a new online dating site and/or re-launch your profile. Revamping your data can result in significantly more activity, with more suitable potential partners to boot!


As in real estate, if people don’t stop to look at a “property,” they’ll never see the wonderful world within!  Author Malcolm Gladwell introduced the important concept of “thin slicing” in his best seller “Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking.” First impressions count far more than most realize, with decisions occurring in two seconds.

Thus, the cover photo counts. Review carefully our IM blog on first dates and impressions before photo shoots and selecting that crucial cover photo. Need help distinguishing hot from not? Show your photo options to a few trustworthy male friends.


Sight is our most influential sense; pictures have 60,000x more impact than text. It is a widely accepted fact that men are more visual than women when it comes to initially assessing a potential partner or date. Thus, choose your photos wisely!

Four to six current photos are ideal. The first should be a glamour shot of you at your best, professionally photographed, if possible. A full body shot in special occasion attire helps a man visualize what you'd look like on a date, at a party or at a business function. A casual, fun shot and a picture of you with friends or family can show your social circle and reveal your lighter side. Activity shots (e.g. yoga, tennis, water sports) show off your fun, athletic side. Partners want to know you will have time to spend with them and that you are versatile. Show you know how to let your hair down after a long work week! Lastly, include a corporate shot if appropriate.

Finally, prepare heavily for professional shoots as well as the taking of casual shots. This effort will yield dividends. Before you begin, read Huffington Post’s compendium of profile tips and WikiHow’s “How to be More Attractive to Men.”

4. DAZZLE WITH YOUR DESCRIPTION Ask friends for ten adjectives that describe you. Two to three well-written, compelling paragraphs are best for your profile. Check out other singles’ dating profiles for inspiration.  Show your diversity and incorporate both fun and sophisticated aspects of yourself, particularly in travel and vacation sections. Balance writing about work with info about your values, hobbies, and social activities. Include what you can provide and seek in a prospective partner.


Share passions to discover common ground. For example, “I’ve never golfed before, but I’m a great athlete and would love to play (particularly with a partner),” or “I’m very athletic and pick things up fast, so I want to learn to ski.” Such statements show potential partners that you are receptive to new things and will introduce them to new experiences as well.


Just as you would weigh all options for listing your home, e.g. which broker(s), websites, strategies, time of year, etc., so too should you strategize about your dating launch or re-launch. Participating in 2+ sites doubles your chance for success. Join a large community (such as or eHarmony) as well as a niche site, e.g. JDate or Ivy Date, targeted towards singles with like religions, hobbies or backgrounds.

Alternate your photos periodically and reconsider your sites if traffic starts to slow.

Pursue listings in different cities if you travel regularly and are open to distance relationships or relocation. Experiment and determine what works best for attracting digital attention.


Many women wait for others to reach out. Search often and contact potential partners. No, you won’t appear desperate and you’ll likely be pleasantly surprised at the number of responses you receive.


Be easy to find.  Explore all features of your online dating community that can push you to the top in search results e.g.’s “Top Spot” feature.

Online dating provides more opportunities to meet men than does any other venue. Don't short sell your own success.

People invest thousands in education, homes, travel, and more. Time spent optimizing your digital real estate could result in the introduction to the love of your life and years of happiness.