Social media gives us a bird's-eye view, at least a curated one, into the lives of our friends, acquaintances, and people we’ve never met before. That being said, what and how much people share varies and can include the mundane, such as what they ate for lunch that day, or the not-so-mundane, like the fact that they’re dating someone new, which can garner a lot of attention, not always all good. If that someone new is you, or you’re the one thinking about posting an update about your love life, here’s why a ‘soft launch’ of a newish relationship on social media may be the right way to go about announcing it.
You want to create curiosity among your followers.
If you’re interested in sparking your followers’ interest, even alluding to a new relationship is a great way to do it. Whether you’re dropping verbal hints or clues via a picture of two sets of feet with the view of the ocean behind them, two ice cream cones, or a selfie of you and your boo cheek to cheek that alludes to a romantic connection between you, you can create a bit of a stir. Not quite the stir you would if you announced you were getting married, but a stir nonetheless. However, …
You don’t want to cause too much commotion.
For many people in the early stages of dating, implying there’s someone new in their life is enough for them at the stage they’re at. The couple wants some attention, but not so much that it invades their privacy, which can be disruptive, especially in a burgeoning relationship.
Though every relationship is fragile and deserving of protection, a new relationship is especially delicate. Even a minor misunderstanding can lead to its demise. When you soft launch, however, you’re able to stay on top of the information going out as well as the information coming in, the latter of which may not always be desirable, especially if someone viewing your posts isn’t happy to see the two of you together.
You want to maintain your privacy.
When you don’t share too much too soon, it’s much easier to field questions from those who want to know more now. With a soft launch, the ball is still in your court regarding whether you wish to provide them with more details.
Because you haven’t put a lot out there, you can decide on a case-by-case basis about what further information you want to share and what you don’t. Keep in mind that not everyone will be as protective of your personal life as you are, or will genuinely be happy for you despite saying they are. By sharing information piecemeal, if a problem arises, such as private details becoming public or a rumor starting, you’ll be better positioned to track down where it originated.
You have an ex and/or kids you’re trying to shield.
Most people will be happy to hear you’ve found a new relationship. But … some individuals may not be “quite” so elated to hear too much too soon, or first hearing about it on social media.
While you shouldn’t live your life for your ex, depending on the circumstances around your breakup, you still may want to be cautious about how much information comes their way and when, especially if it’s soon after the two of you parted ways.
If it's an ex-spouse specifically, you may want to have a private discussion with them first before they learn online that you’re in a relationship. The same holds for parents who may not be thrilled about the partner you’ve chosen to be your new partner. A brief conversation, however, may help alleviate any shock or anger.
Children are a separate story. If they’re old enough to be on social media, it will generally be better for the health of your relationship with them if you set up a time to discuss your new relationship status before the rest of the world finds out.
Even young children who aren’t on social media can be affected by what you post, simply because people discuss what they see online. So, talk to young children, too, and be careful that what you post won’t be hurtful to them should they find out.
You want to make sure.
We’ve all seen that person sing from the rooftops about their new relationship, post a ton of pics, and profess their undying love and devotion, only to wipe that person from their social media accounts and lives shortly after. It can be embarrassing, not to mention cause unnecessary pain. Going through the disappointment of a breakup isn’t fun; having people watch it in real-time and talk about it is even worse.
A soft launch, alternatively, allows you to ease into revealing to others how the situation is going between you and your new partner. Meaning, you can pace what you share according to how secure you’re feeling as a couple. And if the relationship doesn’t work out, the good news is that most people won’t notice immediately if the posts have stopped and that person has disappeared from your life.
Final Thoughts About Soft Launching a New Relationship
While soft launching a new relationship can be an effective way to protect your heart, you and your partner should both be using this social media strategy for the right reasons. If you are using a soft launch or you feel your partner is using it to hide the fact that you’re in a relationship together, then you should question why you are. Though you and the person you’re with may not want to shout from the rooftops that you’re a couple just yet, you want to make sure that if the question comes up, they will.